1964-12-13 ~ 1998-05-02

May, 2008

It's been 10 years since hide's death. I wanted to show that even after 10 years he is not forgotten and still lives in the hearts of the people.
So I asked the visitors of this page to show or tell the world how hide has inspired them.... this is what they send:


a click on the pictures opens the original size of it...

tsukiko Black

May second 1998 the day hide-sama died. I was six years old. On that day hide-sama meant nothing to me in fact it would be two years later almost to they day that I would first hear his name in passing conversation.
I have always been the person who once hears something, anything and knows nothing about that subject mayhap that be a long dead playwright or a brand new scent of air freshener, I have to know more. I have never been fond of this part of my personality as I gain many useless facts, but I will never be sorry that I looked up hide-sama.
As an eight year-old that never quite fit in anywhere due to the fact that my family moved every year, hide-sama appealed to me for many reasons. But mostly because he was a person who stood on his own two feet.
He didn’t need anyone.
He wasn’t a person who needed another to hide behind the curtains when he was on stage and dictate his movements to him. A person to tell him it was okay to be in front next Toshi-sama or annoying Yoshiki-sama during the lull in-between songs.
I thank him everyday somehow someway that he taught me it is okay to be free.

Jess (hideincarnate), USA

When Katrin told me she was holding a ‘contest’ on her page in commemoration of hide, I was excited. Of course I didn’t know what to enter – it could be anything she said, as long as it reflected how much hide meant to us. I decided something resembling an essay would work best.

hide…has inspired me and changed me. I first discovered hide through X Japan, back in 2000 or 2001. To be honest, hide got me into X Japan. At an anime convention, I saw many people with these cute pink haired dolls walking around. I asked one of them what show the doll was from and was told he wasn’t an anime character – he was hide! Lead guitarist of X Japan – or he was. After learning that hide, a dead rock star, could have his own plush doll, I decided I had to learn more about X Japan. My first purchases were the Final Legend photo book, On the Verge of Destruction VCDs, and of course, a hide plush doll.

click for the rest of the essay and a lot of pictures...


I'm Miho, and hide means so, SO much to me.
^ I made my own hide plushie because I can't buy online :]

^ I draw him a lot as well :D
he is my biggest source of inspiration, and thanks to him, I'm still alive.
In the time I wanted to kill myself, hide was there to help me and he pulled me trough. I'm going through a depression again, and it's because of hide I still didn't end my life.
I love him SO damn much.
We'll never forget him :]

Suzanne Dorfield (Australia)

This is a piece I did for 2.5.08. I was very upset that it had been 10 years since everything happened and I really wanted to draw something angsty and miserable to express my own mood. However in the end, all I could come up with was something bouncy and somewhat perverted... and I think that's how hide would prefer being remembered :3

Anna Moric

I've written an essay and a poem, and I've put together a video.


div s

hide is a legend and will continue to be one in my heart. I can't express very well what he means and how he has inspired me.
But when I listen to his music and watch him performing, I truly feel happy, happy to have known his music and him through his music.
To know how much he is loved by millions of people around the globe, speaks in itself about the kind of man he was and will be.
hide will always be in my heart as a legend, as the man who always has a goofy smile that makes others smile in turn, as the man who makes amazing music. Forever~


I have some pics of a tattoo I got recently!

Ami (17, Belgium)

On May 2nd, my friends and I held a weekend in memory of hide.
To make it extra special, we cosplayed hide as he looked during one or other period. This photo is of my best friend and I. She is Saver Tiger hide and I am early '90s hide.
Because we looked rather odd in town during the weekend, a television crew approached us. They were filming for a show where they asked random people on the street, why they deserved a bottle of champagne. When we told them about the weekend and the hide memorial, they thought that it was very interesting. They spent about two hours filming us. The show will air sometime in June.
For us, it really felt as if hide was watching us because we had tried contacting local media to let them know about this, but none of them had responded. It was really special for us, that somehow we still managed to spread the message. And instead of it being local media, our story will be broadcasting on Belgium's most watched channel!

Jessica (Canada)

It was almost as if he'd reached out and said "You can do it".

  When I discovered hide, well, stumbled upon him, six years ago, somehow I knew my world would be changed forever. Like many other fans at the time, I was already bopping along to his songs cheerfully, he had already reached my heart. When I decided to do more research I was shocked to learn he had died prematurely, four years before I even knew his name. Somehow, this really hurt, someone who had been so vibrant and full of life was gone, snuffed out like a candle by the cruel wind.

 'Hero' sounds like a strange word to use for someone that I've never met before, but it's true. When I discovered him, I was going through a really hard time. However, every time I turned on his music I couldn't be sad anymore, I could just let myself go, and rest in hide's voice. It was almost as if he'd reached out and said "You can do it". The ability to make someone else forget about their woes is a very powerful thing, and I'll never forget him for that. As time wore on, I did more research and learned more about what an amazing person he was, and what he did for people. All I remember thinking is "How amazing...I really want to be like that".

 hide was the reason I started playing guitar, and joined a punk band. The band, which we named "Roulette" is on a hiatus right now, all our members have day jobs and the such. However, hide gave me the inspiration and the courage to go outside my comfort zone and learn something new. Whenever I was stuck on writing a song, or playing guitar and was feeling down, I would turn on his music: It was almost as if he'd reached out and said "You can do it".

 Now a days, I still listen to hide...But, I don't have to anymore, because his music has already uplifted my life. I really am, truly, a happier person now for having known his music, and, for lack of a better word, his legacy.

 Even though he's been gone for 10 years now...People still talk about him like he never left.
  We will never forget.

Vicky (USA)

Where do I begin... I orginally saw hide while looking through some jrock pictures and forums about 3 years ago. I was stunned by the pink hair, I thought it was just for one album release since most jrockers don't hold a style for too long, but was amazed when I saw he was always that way.
I was amazed by his style, and started listening to X Japan and then his solo music.
Soon after I spread the bands music to whoever I knew would listen. My mom grew to like the band as well. I first went to Japan 2 summers ago, and while in Harajuku, I found a small jrock store that sold a good amount of hide items. I bought a Rocket Dive plush, the goggles, X Japan cards, and more. The shop owers were so touched, they gave me a limited hide holographic card and bowed. xD
I'm currently in college, and I have draw him a few times. For photoshop I needed to make a Time "Man of the Year" cover, and I choose hide~
When feeling down, some of his songs help, since it seems he was often in the same place, even though I don't believe his death was suicide. He means a lot to me personally, and he's definately not forgotten. I listen to is music daily, I got a pink ipod the color of his hair, and so on~


Stay Free My Misery
Pink font, of course, is only appropriate for the subject of this essay of sorts as I call it. Apparently there is a contest where the winners are randomly selected where the entries are meant to show how hideto Matsumoto has influenced “you.” When I first saw that this was in existence I was thrilled. I’m not sure why exactly but lately I have been writing quiet often when I had something on my mind and I really want to put those things to good use. May 2nd, 2008 was the ten year anniversary of hide’s death. Waiting for the date I wasn’t sure if I should be happy that he lived or mourn his death. I did both. From the short three to four years that I’ve known about hide I believe that he wouldn’t want us all to be mourning over him. YOSHIKI himself has been asked (several times) what he believes hide thinks of X JAPAN’s return and replied that he thinks that hide is proud. I agree fully and on May 2nd I did mourn for his death, but I also celebrated his life, his music, and everything that he was and still is, and what he’s done for me in my life so far. I’m not here to state what I feel is right or wrong concerning his passing, or to put words into his mouth, or put thoughts into his brain. I am here to try and express in words the things that this man has inspired me to do, be, and what he has helped me through. If you are reading this I apologize, it’s not the most regular essay and I m not very good with words so please bear with me.
            I am not entirely sure where I should start, so I guess it’s best to start from the beginning. I was in my sixth or seventh grade when JRock was injected into my life. This was one of the darkest times of my life, and a time I was about ready to give it up. I hear from some places that most teenage suicides occur in High School years, but it seemed like I heard more about it then than I am now and I’m at the end of my sophomore year of High School. Every night, as I would lie in bed trying to fall asleep I would sit up and cry. Not crying myself to sleep, I had long past that ability, but just crying because I didn’t know how to do anything else. Every night I would think “Why am I still here? Is there really a point to my life? Everyone would be happier if I were gone.” I knew that my parents would be upset, but there were even nights when I questioned if they would cry or not. I don’t come from a broken family or a dysfunctional family at all really, but like a lot of youth I still am not understood by them and I was pushed to the limit. It was shortly after my second or third night of thinking of ending it all when I was forever tainted. The history and background of how a friend of a friend gave us a name to look up and then how everything exploded from there isn’t entirely important at the moment so to make a long story short: my life was forever changed just at the right time. When I write things like this, I always think I’m exaggerating, but then I remember the notebooks and everything else I had at the time that kept my secrets.
            When X JAPAN, hide, and the others entered my life, I was given a reason to live. I knew that no matter what it took, I would somehow have a career that involved this music. I was determined to spread this to others and maybe even save lives the way it had mine. I knew that if I could ever do anything give back to these gods, it would all be well worth it. My life isn’t the only that I owe to hide and the others. He has helped to inspire everything that I am; my personality, my thoughts, my style, my beliefs, and just about everything else that makes me who I am. I will fully admit that hide is not the only one that has done all of this and more, but he is one of the more prominent ones who has. Every night, I pray to hide and the others that are with him where ever they are. I can’t bring myself to pray to some religions “God” but I can pray to what I know is real. I believe that he is somewhere else, as well as still among us. This thought keeps me alive and helps me cope with the death of those around me. Knowing that a person like hideto was alive and being able to believe that no matter where he is he is somewhere keeps me sane. Throughout my room I have two posters with hide on them, two pictures printed out of hide, a shirt with him on it, and three plush dolls (soon to increase in number). He is the only one seen that often in my room.
            The title of this is “Stay Free My Misery” which is a quote from his song “MISERY.” This single line has become a quote for me to live the way I want and not let anything bring me down. To keep this from becoming too long and to keep myself from repeating ideas over again I will try to finish up here soon. Matsumoto hideto has given me courage when I’ve needed it most. He has given me joy when I wanted to cry and made me cry and laugh at the exact same time. He’s given the color pink a whole new respect from me, and he has made me who I am today. I cannot begin to imagine where I would be today if hide had never entered my life, nor can I imagine what life would have been like if I had known about him when he was still alive. I know that he hasn’t inspired me “more” than everyone else, but then again who has? That is something that cannot be measured by anyone other than your own self. I do know that I can almost guarantee that my life has been saved and changed by nothing more and nothing less than hideto Matsumoto, now and forever more.  

J - Taiyo

wei rong,17

i was introduced to x japan two years back by my brother, whom he saw in wikipedia. he showed me the youtube video of x japan's "endless rain". In the past, i do not liked rock, metal and any other stuff. i termed them "noisy" and very "crazy". the first time when i watched their video, i was actually quite scared =p, because i think they looked very "scary". but however, their song was really great.
i began searching for their pv's in youtube. soon, i became addicted to their music...and i was attracted to a particular member in x japan, that is, hide. he looked very professional in all the pvs, and was attracted by the every guitar solos on each and every song of x japan. hide's visual aesthetics, guitar skill, and antics on stage can made me go wild. and overtime, i began to realize that in fact, rock music has it's own artistic value, way different from mainstream music.
i began to listen to hide's and x japan's songs regularly, till this day. their songs always accompany me in times of loneliness, sadness. i'm known to be a obscure person in school, in life and i no one to talk to in school,and at home. but everytime i listen to x japan songs, i can feel that they are telling me "we are always here for you.", and this made me better. i then made this wish for myself, to learn guitar and perform with x japan, with hide. little did i know that hide had actually died in 1998. i remembered that i cried, when i saw the video footage of hide's funeral, of why such a inspiring artist, musician would leave this world.
but however, my dream of learning guitar was being deferred, mostly due to having major exams, and i don't have money to get a guitar. However, this dream of mine is still burning, for two years... 
Now, i'm in a tertiary institute, and i have sign up for their guitar classes. i hoped i can get in, and fulfill my dream i made two years ago. now, i have another dream: i want to be a musician, to enjoy music, just like x japan, just like hide.
To sum it up: hide is not my idol, he is my god. he gave me things that people did not: music and love.
To hide: may i see you someday in heaven when i die.  

Yordi Visser (Netherlands)

My name is Yordi Visser, Im from Holland and Im 18 years old.
Im a fan of X Japan since I was 15, I still remember the date: 17 March, 2005
It wasnt only the day I first heard my favorite band, but it was also a life-changeing moment.
I first saw hide in the video of "X Japan - X (The Last Live)"
and I simply fell in love with him.
(A sidenote: I am straight, but the one guy I fell in love with is hide.)
Furthermore, I play music myself and I was just blown away by his amazing skill on not only the guitar
but also on other instruments and his great voice.
About a day after I first heard X, I started looking for info on the members and more of their music.
The first song I found was hide's Misery, this song has helped me so many times when I had a hard time
or when things where going bad in my life.
after that, I started exploring more of their music, I bought all the albums and dvd's I could find.
Some people call me obsessed, but music is just a huge part of my life and especially X Japan and hide.
My dream has been since that day to see hide live in concert though I know this could never happen.
I like to think hide lives on through his music and through the music people make for him.
Im sorry I cant wright more, but my feelings for hide can't be expressed with words.
Bu there isnt a day in my life that I don't miss him.
What I can say is that in January Im getting "hide" tattooed in my wrist :)
I also have a X Japan tattoo:
I hope you get a lot of reactions of hide's fans all over the world!
We are X!!!
~Yordi Visser


Essay on what it is to inspire.

    Hideto Matsumoto, a legend, a hero, an aritst.  Most instantaneously say these things, but not me.
For me, he was more than a legend or a hero, he was an inspiration, and more importantly, he was apart of my childhood. Back in 1995, my fathers friend had gone on a trip to Japan, and brought back some music, he played two songs, and I was hooked. I asked, Who is this? and he say X JAPAN. I was in love, and though not until the early 2000's did I learn about their history, due to the expansion of the world wide web, I loved every second of their music.
He showed me pictures, and instantly my eyes went to this fluffy pink headed person in the oddest clothing I had ever seen. I pointed to them, Who is that?
Thats hide,[hee day] the Guitarist. I smiled, and said, I like him.
I know for a child to love someone merely cause of their look, but I was 5, and I would not know till I was 7, how amazing this man was. At 7 I heard his solo works, starting with HIDE YOUR FACE album. I loved it and had the album on replay.  I grew more, and then, sadly, not even a year later, I was watching the news with my grandfather when a small 15 second mention of the death of a Japanese rock musician, Hideto Matsumoto, aired.
I cried, no one knew why, they kept asking, why are you crying why are you crying? All I could do was point to the tv, which had now moved on to another more "important" story.
I hardly spoke for almost a year, not till I discovered another band that would be a major influence in my life did I start running and smiling again. That band was Dir en grey, but that...thats a story for another time.
When I was little, I would smile, I would laugh, and I would hum along to the melodies of this mans work.
He helped carve my childhood.
But when I got older reaching 10 , did I come to terms with what had happened, and take it to heart, and use his memory to drive my artistic ambitions. At this age, I began to understand why he did what he did, and who he really was. He was a man, who was who ever he wanted to be, a man who took the worse , and made it sound happy, he inspired.
He was ..inspiration. He had drove my childhood, and he began to fuel my life as a young teen. I began to see, I should not be afraid of who I was, That I should not be afraid to act myself. And although it took another musician, Miyavi, to help enforce that, he started me on that road.
He drove me to create, to be, to live, and to inspire others.
Now nearly 18 years old, I live for him, each day, I try my hardest, and smile my best, for him.
How many heros do you encounter in your life? Chances are many.
But how many inspirations do you encounter? Only one can truly be the root of inspiration in your life.
And hide, is that one for me.
So from this man, I learned.
To smile.
To laugh.
To love.
To be.
To create.
And to Inspire.

I thank him, each day, for all he has done, and will continue to do for me.

Johnathan Ogden (UK)

here is a picture of me paying in my band, most of the music i have wrote for it have been inspired by hide's solo work and X Japan mainly but unfortionatly i do not have any recordings of the songs also included is a memorial picture i made for hide.

Adam Clark (secretlybateman)

Hey I'm 'secretlybateman' in the forum...but my name is Adam :)
First I'd would like to say, along with nearly everyone else, I would've loved to be in Japan for the hide Memorial Summit with all those awesome bands and many thousands of fans paying tribute. But I guess it's not to be.
The picture, or rather 'fan art', I drew to give to whoever when I went on the JRR International eXperience tour thing, but apparently Yoshiki was supposed to come to our reception but he was still doing rehearsal or something, so I still have it. Although I can still say that was the best experience of my life.. so far hehe. By the way I don't like drawing in pen or whatever, thats why its soo light.
I have also included a picture of me...sortof, at the Night of Destruction concert...I'm the one in the white circle :)...as you can see we got some pretty incredible seats.
Other than that drawing, there isn't much that I have done in memorial of hide, although since he is still so incredibly popular, in terms of his music, influence in music and overall person after soo many years, it does not feel like all of him has left this world.
Even though I may not be in a band... or able to play an instrument well, I have started to learn to play guitar, and am certain that if I am one day good enough, that any songs I write will be influenced heavily by all Jrock artists, X Japan and hide inparticular.
I am only 18 at the moment, and so, as of the age of 7, when hide died, I had no concept of the effect this had on thousands of people and many times more fans, and when I did know of X Japan I was 13y.o. and that had already been broken up for 6 years. I always feel odd when talking about X Japan because I never really knew how they were as a complete band, and even though X Japan lives on with various other guitarists and of course we all love the hologram hide, it still reminds us of an awesome musician attached to a wonderful personality, whose life was tragically cut short soo many years ago. And in the words of the beautiful song recently showcased at Night of Destruction, Madness and Creation;
  'I feel alone
Now I embrace even words which hurt each other
And I only look back
I feel alone...'
  ...we all feel alone...
  '...Without you.'


Hide~~~ your soul will always be with X JAPAN and in the hearts of everybody~~~
As Toshi say during the concert 2008, You will be walking together with X Japan and ALL THE FANS WILL WALK WITH XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX!!!!

X JAPAN!!!!!!!!


click the picture for the animated original...


:P Dunno if it really counts but i started playing guitar because of hide...
...Also learned parts of some X Japan songs before I got too lazy... lol
..Still need to Finish Kurenai...and X....
...probably should finish Silent Jealousy also.